What is The American Dream? This is something I have been asking myself a lot here lately. I feel I have a unique perspective on this question, because I am not from America. My mom and dad moved here to find the American Dream. They moved here for my sister and I to find it. Americans had found it, so now it was our turn to try and find it. When I was about seven years old, long before I knew I was moving to America I had a dream I was in American….flying (yes flying) around tall buildings (hang in there Kelly, I am not going to get all dream interpretation on you) but I dream t of America. I think I had just seen the music video “Born in the USA” so somehow it snuck into my night time dreams. Five years later when I turned twelve, we packed five suitcases and got on a plane and that was it, bye bye Ireland, hello USA.

Am I living the American Dream? Back then the dream was big house, big car, big TV, everything was cheap, money was no object, because this was America! Eighteen years later that dream seems so silly. Now, I am trying to sell my big house, avoid a big car, everything is expensive! Ok I am keeping the Big TV, sorry.  So the dream has changed. My American Dream is now very different. An old friend introduced me to their husband this weekend, and said, “this is Greg, he is from Ireland, but has a southern accent” I kinda sunk in my seat a little bit. I am not knocking the southern accent (Leigh Anne), but it kinda hit me…….I am one of US now. Was that not my dream? To be American? To fit in? I guess it was. So to answer my question, Yes. I am living the American Dream, because I married an American Girl, I have an American Boy, and now I am an American Man, doing things the American way……kinda. I still have my Irish moments. But you know what? I am going to hold onto my Irish ways, because they make people laugh, and they make me who I am. Ok thats all I got.

Between the ages of 5 and 9 I remember summer time as fun in the sun, and getting a tan! I would brown really nice. I never burned. I would just get this really nice looking brown tan all over my body, and people were jealous. Everyone would admire my beautiful tan, I looked like a little foreign boy from spain or somewhere tropical. You may not think anything of that, but for a little Irish boy, this was a big deal. At least it was a big deal to all the grown ups around me, because most everyone in Ireland is pale white, and when there is a heat wave and the sun is shining (which is not often!), they fry like lobsters. So for me to tan and not burn, I was a super hero among my Irish counterparts. I was an elite.

Ohh but like every superhero I had a weakness, or a vulnerable spot you might say. That spot was my buttocks. It was as white as snow. So when I tanned, my glory was short lived when my mother thought it was the greatest thing ever to show everyone my buttocks, to compare my tanned back to my bright white untanned butt cheeks. She would yell with excitement to her friends or whoever was around, “look at this boys beautiful tan, and see how his little cheeks are snow white….isn’t it glorious!” she would say. Every time we met someone she knew (or didn’t know, it didn’t matter! I dreaded being called over….because as soon as I got within arms distance of her, she grabbed me threw me over her knees and down came my pants, and behold there was a beacon of light shining as bright as the moon, that moon was full, that moon was my butt.

Earlier I posted photos of Desmond, because I just thought they were so cute, but Jackie suggested I pull them down….and I agreed, I was not thinking, but then I got to thinking, and the above entry is what came of it. So Bonus for that. For those that got to see his cute little butt, congrats! (I know who you are!) it is chubby and beautiful.

In my head I had grand ideas of what my 1st Fathers Day would be like. I would wake up to bacon hanging from the ceiling fan, spinning round and round like beautiful pig butterfly’s flapping in the wind. I would step into the kitchen and turn the cold faucet on and ice cold beer would flow like liquid gold. I would twist the hot faucet on and hot cheese dip would fill my sink, and nacho chips would fall from the sky. The day would be about me, me, ME! Oh yes, it would be a glorious day indeed. Realistic? No of course not….but I told you it was a grand idea!

Fathers Day today for me was not my “Grand Idea”, but it was something else. I think God had a lesson in store for me and that lesson was “to give myself, rather then receive”. My day was spent helping others. Others who at any moment would help me when I needed them, without question. I ended up doing the one thing I hate most “Yard Work”  if you will notice, its a double four letter word. The worst kind! And doing other peoples yard work is even worse! Which is what this was. I did however get to use a chainsaw with no supervision, or guidence! Fixing the chain when it fell off? no sweat! Im a total pro now. Using the chainsaw was something that was always “Dads job” who was the Dad this time? I looked around and only saw me of course. Afters hours of cutting, chopping, hauling, getting flesh wound after flesh wound. It was time to call it quits and move on to a “Fathers Day Lunch”, only to be tricked into moving furniture! There are some sneaky Mothers in this family, I’m not naming any names! They lure you in with food, and BAAM! before you know it you are moving an entire room of furniture from the 3rd floor down.

So now that I am a father, what does that mean? It means I care for my family, I protect them at all costs and I do what needs done even when I do not want to do it. You do what you have to do to get through life, and to help the ones you love get through life also. A selfish attitude will not feel as rewarding at the end of the day. A positive selfless attitude however is a fulfilling feeling at the end of the day. That is how I want to live my life, and that is the type of Dad I want Desmond to see in me. I just pray I can be that way. It won’t be easy. But THAT is what I learned about being a Father today.

So what was my special Fathers Day Gift this weekend? Saturday morning Jackie carries Desmond into the bedroom and places him on the bed beside me, Desmond is carring an IPod Touch. Something I have been drooling over for months and months. As much as I loved that gift, and I really really do love it. The gift of both of them laying in the bed beside me playing and laughing together as a family with the ipod touch laying untouched on the floor.

I am getting old it seems. 30 is finally kicking in. I am turning into the grumpy old man that the younger generation hates. I have feared this day for sometime now. I can either embrace it, or fight it. I am not sure what to do. The past few weeks has brought me face to face with the “you kids get off my lawn ” syndrome as I like to call it. It all started with Indiana Jones. I noticed two words of bad language that have never been used in any of the previous Indiana movies. Why Spielberg? Ohh why? Did you feel the need to put them in the new one? It actually ruined the movie for me. Completely unnecessary. Now when Desmond is old enough to watch these movies with me and enjoy them, I have to make an effort to bleep it out….twice. We may just stick with the original, it was the best one anyway. So take that!

Moment number two was tonight at Sonic. I was trying to place my order into the speaker box from hell. The poor little girl on the other end was trying I know that, but when ”BoomShalaka” pulls up in the spot next to us in his low riding, 17 inch chrome rimming 92 Honda Accord, with a speaker system that can be heard and felt by the Mars Lander (who has a twitter account btw) and the ground shaking below me. She can’t hear me. After repeating my order 6 times to get a 99cent peanut butter milk shake, I explode. I scream at BoomShalaka to turn his bloody radio down, he pretends to not hear me, and drives off. Then to make matters worse, the girl keeps calling me “Mam”. This has been a thorn in my side for most of my life, I am always mistaken for a Mam on the phone, I don’t know why, I guess I talk softly. I firmly and deeply in the manliest voice I can, I  speak into the speaker system, and say, “its Siiiiiiiirrrrrrr”. She doesn’t care, now shes mad at me. I can totally tell from her 15 year old tude, whatev’s! At this point I am just beat down, I politely as I can beg “please lady I just want my freakin milkshake, before I have a stroke”. Desmond slept through the whole thing. Jackie laughed and reminded me of my blood pressure. At that point I relized I just needed to let it go, and suck on my peanutbuttery goodness.

Some people say 30 is the new 21. I am beginning to think 30 is the new 60. However I will fight to remain young, and pray for patience. I can laugh at myself, I promise. Look at this blog for crying out loud. Desmond’s picture today is a representation of how I feel. Sometimes I want to just pull my hair out. He however makes it look so cute, thats something I am not sure I can pull off nearly as well.

-=warning, the following post contains graphic material, viewer discretion is advised=-

When I was a kid, I had sinus issues, the doctors said it was “over active” so use your imagination, let it run wild for a minute. I would use my over active sinus in emergency situations only. I am sharing this information for educational purposes only. Desmond, when you are old enough to read this, we will talk more.

So you might be wondering how I could possibly use my “over active sinus” problems to my advantage? Well as a kid growing up, I lived among my fair share of bullies. Actually there was a whole street of them, and I remember them all by name to this day. I have a list, and if I ever find their IP address so help them. Anyway, I am not much of a fighter, never have been. I have touched on that subject before in my “throwing punches” post. My Dad even signed me up for Kick-Boxing one time. I guess thinking maybe that would help me. The first night there I got punched so hard in the stomach I felt my mashed potatoes come up from dinner an hour earlier, and as much as we Irish love our spuds, they do not taste better the 2nd time around. I was then placed in a choke hold to make sure I did not throw them up, how considerate.

Most times I just ran. Like an Irish Forest Gump I ran! I ran like the wind. I could at least out run most of those boys. I had crazy reflexes too, I could turn and duck like a ninja. Sure a shirt might have been grabbed or ripped, but I always escaped. But then there was the time I was surrounded, there was no escape. I was in the middle of the street being closed in on, and everyone was watching, because Hogan was about to get a beat down….again.

The funny thing is I remember I had two “Digestive Biscuits” in my hand (cookies for u Americans). If you have ever had these you know they are dry and stick to your teeth and gum’s like a paste. They are meant to be dipped in hot tea, but only for a second, because it will break, fall off and turn our tea into a soggy mess! I was really happy to have these biscuits in my hand, they were not my favorite, but a treat no less from my mom who had just given them to me. I sure as heck was not letting them go to waste for a butt kicking. What happened next I have only shared with maybe two people in this whole world, I am about to reveal my act of pure desperation.

I was in an impossible situation, the following actions are justified. What was I to do? As my attackers closed in on me I shoved both of those digestive biscuits in my mouth (not recommended) I chewed them as best I could. I then took a deep breath blew as much air out my nose and mouth as I could possibly could blow and screamed bloody murder. What happened next was both hilarious and disturbing. Chewed up biscuit spew and flew everywhere, and from my nose came an unholy amount of over active sinus snot, I was like a human can of silly string from which there was no escape! I swung my head left to right to maximize damage and coverage. If I was going down, so was everyone else around me in a phlegm of glory. Boys were screaming for their mothers, little girls were crying for their fathers, parents were in complete shock and awe. When I opened my eyes I stood there alone on the street, everyone had ran away. THEY had ran away. I was victorious, and I………needed a tissue.

So there you have it, my shame, my victory, my complete respect for airborne mucus. I have been sick now for over a week with a sinus infection. It has brought back memories of my childhood. You all have been warned; do not mess with The Hogan when his sinus’s are over active, or I will unleash the flood.

a year ago on this very day
we knew a baby was on the way
deep inside he began to grow
his name and face we did not know

as each day passed you began to prepare
a home for him and us to share
and when that little boy arrived
his little cry filled our hearts with joy

and now a year from last mothers day
so much has come and gone our way
a little boy who loves you dear
our little son, you hold so near

your a mother now, from this day on
a mothers love keeps his heart strong
his smile is yours, his love is true
there is no one in his eyes like you

I love you J. You are an amazing mom.
Happy 1st Mothers Day

I am under the weather (allergies/sinus infection) this Mothers day, which I am not happy about. I am missing all the madness that is happening at the McDow’s mothers day party. So in my Melancholia (not melon collie as Jackie pointed out) state, I put on the Braveheart Soundtrack (one of the best movie scores ever!) and I sat down to write my wife a Mothers day poem. I have not wrote any poems in a long long long time, but this Mothers Day I feel I am allowed to get all mushy.

Happy Mothers day to my mom and all the moms out there, you are all so wonderful and beautiful.

Long ago in the hills of Lough Gur Ireland a Prince who’s father, The Earl of Desmond and Mother Queen Áine placed  a spell on the boy to teach him a lesson. He had the ability to take any shape or form and was turned into the last thing he was which was a raven. To break the spell he had to ride his horse around the lake 1 time every 7 years until the horses silver shoes wore down and broke. Only then would the spell be broken, and he would be free to change back to himself. Some say the spell is broken, and he swims with his mothers spirit around the lake in the form of a swan. Others say he still rides around the lake, every 7 years. Queen Áine died and was buried on the hill my Nana lives on. She was buried with her large treasure of gold. That treasure and her grave have never been found.

These are the kinds of stories my Nana would tell me before bedtime when I spent the summers at her home in Country Limerick. My imagination would run wild at the ideas of finding such a thing. I would get up early in the mornings and roam the hills looking for clues. I would dig holes for hours and days all over the country side. I have made many a farmer mad, been chased by my fair share of bulls, I have been stuck in barbed wire, shocked by electric fences, you name it I did it. All to find a treasure.

My Nana turns 80 today.  She is by far the most entertaining woman I have ever known. She has given me some of the best memories of my childhood in Ireland. I spoke with her earlier and she had a suprise party this past weekend. They did a big thing at Bunratty Castle,they did not get home till 5:30am. That’s what I mean, she rolls like that, and she is 80! Happy Birthday Nana, thank you for all the wonderful stories that I will get to tell Desmond for years to come. His imagination will run wild just like mine. I just hope I can tell the stories as well as you did.

The top picture was taken July 18th 1998 at 8:12pm It includes Jake, Myself and Thomas (Matt is missing, we miss you Matt) The next picture was taken March 29 2008 at 7:08pm. Pretty close to 10 years later. In those ten years since that 1st picture was taken, life has changed significantly. The product of those ten years are outlined in the photos below. Beautiful wives, and beautiful kids. Two of my dearest friends from High school were in town this weekend. Jake from NY and Thomas from Savannah. Back in High School (WRHS) we would talk about the day when we would hang out and watch our kids play together. The reality of that dream came true this weekend. We hung out and watched our kids play together, it was beautiful. Full of laughter and joy. Holly, Jakes sister who has been like a sister to us guys herself was also there, with two beautiful girls. It only seems like yesterday that we were kids ourselves playing together.

I love kids, always have. Especially the kids of this family. This Easter weekend heightened my love for all of them. I have had time to reflect on what was different about this weekend. It was Desmond. I think having a child of my own opened my eyes to enjoying watching other children play together. I kept picturing how next year Desmond will be running around looking for eggs. I saw him in them, and what the future brings for him. Also being a parent now, I feel I am part of a new club. I am not just the Uncle running around with the camera taking pictures of other peoples children.

*Updated*
I had a moment with each one of them this weekend, I will start with the youngest….

Desmond and I talked for a while Sunday morning before church as Jackie got ready, he just laughed and smiled as I tried to eat his little feet.

Danny laughs so much! I could hear him as I laid in bed Sunday morning laughing, and when I came around the corner to surprise him he just giggled and ran.

Ivy came running over to me when we were hunting eggs, and I bent down beside her, to talk to her. She was in a hurry, but not in too much of a hurry to tell me she loved me as she ran off.

Benjamin made me laugh as he eyed the cupcakes on the table, (see picture) he also helped me carry my camera and tripod into the house. I was a little nervous, because he is the breaker of all things, but he did real good.

Dylan is such a Rock Star, his hair maybe in his eyes, but he has a look about him. I really believe that little boy is going to do great things. Write a song, paint a picture, take a photo, something that will make people stop.

Aidan, Kelly said it best, he is so GQ or Ralph Lauren. He had some moments with Danny at the egg hunt (see picture) that caused everyone to stop and pull out their camera. He is growing up so fast. He is kind, sweet and gentle.

Emmett and I had a little walkie-talkie fun, it was a combination of hide-in-go-seek with radio’s. As I was running around the bushes and cars, with him hot on my heels, it was then I realized how much I missed being a kid.

The other part of this weekend that I enjoyed so much was, I myself can still be a kid in a way. I had to laugh at myself Saturday night as Joey and I rocked out to guitar hero. We stayed in and took care of the boys so the girls could have a night out. After getting them to sleep, I stood in front of the TV with a plastic guitar, a beer, and a baby monitor strapped to my hip. I could not BE any COOOLER! It all had led up to that moment, and somehow I made it work for me.

There are about a gazillion photos to look at, so just click (HERE)

Life in general personally has just been rough. Spiritually lost, financially frustrated, low self esteem, and the four letter word we all hate “work”. When all seems lost I look to Jackie for strength. I look at Desmond who just looks at me and smiles and laughs, he doesn’t care whats going on with me, he is just happy to see me, and THAT is what I have waited my whole life to see. He can put things in perspective. Life as a family is starting to find its groove and find its place in time. It is also starting to bring meaning to why we deal with the downs of each day. We deal with the downs to live for the ups. I totally made that up, but it sounds deep. I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I am sure another tunnel is on the horizon, but I will deal with that when it comes. One thing about falling down is you become humbled, and being Spiritually Lost for a short moment, it forces you to ask for help from the one Higher Power that can help you stand back up. Then gradually you are no longer Lost, and you find your way again. Ok Thanks for listening, that was very therapeutic Lets move on to the star of the show!

Our boy is growing! He can stand on his own, with balance support of course, he talks about everything! I have no idea what he is saying, but he is very certain about what he has to say. Sleeping is getting better! It is easier to put him down at night, and he still wakes up around 2am’ish but going back to sleep seems to be easier. Have I mentioned how strong he is? We have moved away from the swaddle at night. He laughs in the face of a swaddle. There have been nights I come to check on him and he has undone and rolled the swaddle into a ball and left a sticky note that says “better luck next time”. he is such a Houdini and a comedian. I am working on getting video together of him jabbering. So I will get that up within the next week or so.